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In the IRotunda
Continued from Page One.
hurst are chagrined to know that he is a mere piker, as Wall Street has it, when compared with his brother di¬ vine in BrooKlyn. Had these bril¬ liant pulpiteers devoted their talents exclusively to their flnancial ventures tbey would no doubt have reaped a handsome reward. How clear be¬ comes Luke's famou$ diagnosis of hu¬ man nature: "No servant can serve two masters: for either he wlll hate the one and love the olher; or else be will hold to tbe one and despise tliie other, l'e caunot serve God and Mammon." II is understood that Dr. Parkhurst has repented himself and returned to Ills high calling and that once he can rid himself of lawsuits and lawyers, Dr, Hillis wili follow his example. When pulpiteering is .slighted for financiering, Satan be¬ comes sacristan and empty become the pews.
canism and the party generally will be satisfied with his selection.
The Simplified Spelling Board which met at Columbia University, last week, reported that 11 now has a membership of 144 universities, col¬ leges and normal schoola whose facul¬ ties and sludents, numbering 1150.000, are enthusiastically engaged in "the amelioration of English spelling." Tbe words which, it gleefully insists, have been ameliorated are twelve iu number, and tbie is the way it now spells 'em: tho, allho, thru, thruout, thoro, thorofare, thoroly, catalog, decalog. pedagog. program, prolog. Thirty-one letters are thus eliminat¬ ed. In time, no doubt, the Board wlll fake us back to the spelling of our forefathers, who, good men, didn't know how to spell at all. If a beg¬ garly dozen are all that can be claimed after ten years' work, the wonder is that the gentlemen wbo are ri*ing this hobby al such a snail-like pace do nol get off and walk.
The range of the four 16-lnch guns to be located on Rockaway Beach is exactly 13 miles. The Rockville Cen¬ tre strategists flgure that the extreme limit reached by their shells would be Sam Blumenthal's m^at shop on Vil¬ lage avenue. This would leave the Baptist church, the Ice plant, Tony's barber shop, the Owl offlce, the Long Island depot and tbe easterly suburbs of tbal metropolis wholly unprotect¬ ed. Something wlll have to be done I about tbis. (or tbe strategists who have made this discovery seem to be much excited over it.
Tbe judge who declares an accused person guilty after a jury has just rendered a verdict of acquittal ought to be subject to a civil suit for slan¬ der. Such affronts to conscientious jurymen acc/.irt for '>alf tii • d'slike Ihat stlf-ierpectin;; .nen liavc lo.- serving as jurors.—Brooklyn Eagle.
This shaft is aimed at a Brooklyn judge and will prove ineffective. The judicial allocution in Brooklyn is as strongly intrenched a habit as the rubber plant and the baby carriage. Why disturb it. neighbor?
Perhaps it was the unpopularity of Senator Smith rather than the popu¬ larity of Ford that caused the Michi¬ gan Republicans to take the latter to their bosom. Perhaps tbey thought it was an automobile contest. In whicb, of cour.se, the flivver would be the favorite. Perhaps—but wliat's the use in guessing the why or the whei'efore wlien a great mass of vot¬ ers rears on its hind legs and plunges at the ballot box?
Ifs singular what a lot of unat¬ tractive ladies' faces appear in the New York Sunday newspapers. It's a wager that Home, Sweet Home Is seldom sung wherever the originals are domiciled.
The burning question of the liour is: Has tliis Wilson Administration nii.sHhipped our package of seeds?
P. S.—Tlie package has just ar¬ rived. Thanks, Congressman.
Burl Gardner's seismograph was so violently disturbed on primary night that for a few monments he wondered whether Pulitzer, Miles and the whole organization ticket were in the soup. But its needle pointed sort of sou-.^ou- wesl and not due south to Felix and Hempstead and he was reassured. Diligent telephone enquiry located the disturbance at Lynbrook where it appeared tbat Uncle Thomas K. Box, who had led and misled ils Democralic host for a full quarter century, had been engulfed by one of those cafaclysmic horrors that occa¬ sionally convulse the political world. Uncle Thoma.s had been beaten In his twenty-seventh race for the county conimitteemanahip; the one Democrat on the south shore wbo, his critics declare, wouldn't spend a nickel to see an earthquake, had wit¬ nessed one of those awful disturb¬ ances of nature without it.s costing him a cent. The winner of the his¬ toric race was Prof. Edward McNally, a Democrat of repute, a gentleman and a scholar, a good judge of public sentiment and Democracy, and a com¬ mutter. In the Lynbrook vernacular. Uncle Tom's enemies have got him In Mill River Creek on a rising tide, and he's in up to his neck. The Democrat who engineered his discomfiture is Counsellor Martin Sprlngsteed. long his lieutenant, but who objected to being longer "double-crossed" (what¬ ever that may be) by his leader. Uncle received 22 votes to 3 5 for the Professor—and the latter all had to be "written In." Something like a sigh of relief, possibly of satisfaction, was heard In the library that night aa Burt hung up the receiver.
A difference of opinion must exist between the editor of the Huntington Long Island Herald and his foreman. The former prepared an editorial di¬ lating upon the land bank law given 'tis by Oov. Glynn and gloatingly head¬ ed it: "Another Democratic Achieve¬ ment." The foreman piaced the head line over a «olumn of garden sass hints beginning "apply a heavy coat of well rotted manure on tlje garden early in the spring before spading." News reports from Huntington con¬ tain as yet no mention of a homicide In the Herald office.
Democrats of Rockvllie Centre who believed that the party in its 24th dis¬ trict was afflicted with "political mange" saw nothing in the primary in that district to change their con¬ viction,
The Republican selected to serve as temporary chairman of the National Convention at Chicago, Is a news¬ paper man. United States Sebator Warren G. Harding of Ohio. He is 51 years old, served four years in the State Senate and two years as lieu¬ tenant governor. He was his party's candidate for governor six years ago and was defeated by Judson Harmon. Attorney General in President Cleve¬ land's second administration. Sena¬ tor Hardfng Is a "straight goods" Republican and it was he who nomi¬ nated President Taft at Chicago four years ago. As temporary chairnian he will be called upon to deliver the speech which Ttrill to a considerable extent outline the party policy-— ometimes called the "keynote speech" of the oonvention. He Is not exactly the man whom Colonel RooseTelt would have picked had he been con¬ sulted. There is no doubt, however, of the genuineness of his Reptibtl-
Tliey do say In Democratic circles that the Connolly movement to seize the two district delegates to St. Louis was engineered chiefly with a view to compelling Congressman Brown to tap a barrel of dross supposed to be kept in his cellar at St. James. Sev¬ eral pre-primary conferences were held at the Hotel Biltmore, Manhat¬ tan, before it was decided to take the plunge. Evidently the Congressman didn't take the hint. The results in Nassau and Suffolk would seem to jus¬ tify the belief that be can nominate himself again for Congress, thi.s fall, if he so chooses.
Ail U-Boats Heard From.--New York Times headline.
Ranging their commanders along the quarter deck, the Kaiser adjusted his piercing eye, and demanded, "Did any of you. my brave boye, sink the Sussex?"
"Nixie." was the stentorian re- .spon.se of each.
Thereupon the report of the Kais er's full investigation was transmit¬ ted without being censored to Wash¬ ington.
Washington breathed a sigh of re¬ lief and methodically put Its pad and pencil away for some other day.
Tbe military mind of a national guardsman is a curious, nol to say wonderful, creation. The proposition for a State police largely for rural service ia no .sooner broached than the commander of our State National Cuard, General Stotesbury, proposes that it sball be composed of details from bis Guard. Most of the time of a rural police, like that of policemen generally. Is spent In preventing crime and arresting criminals. As the New York World points out, "for that we need State policemen, not soldiers. There is no more reason why a State police .should l5e detailed from the Na¬ tional Guard than why city police should be Guardsmen."
The Evening Journal, owned by Mr. Hearst, has announced repeatedly that ministers "endorse Mr. Hearst's war on fighting." The Evening Jour¬ nal of yesterday contains a paid ad¬ vertisement announcing that the Stadium Athletic Club would have "two .star ten-round bouts" at the Manhattan Opera Hou.se.—New York Morning Telegraph.
Thus the "warfare" of Mr. Hearst against the dreadful sin of boxing goes on. He taketh in receipts for advertising II with one hand, and handeth them out to his "ministers" with the other. A truly novel way of accelerating newspaper circulation.
County Committeeman Jayger, of Rockville Cenire. put liis nose into the Oceanside primary and was seri¬ ously disfigured politically in conse¬ quence. County Committeeman Gir¬ dell V. Brower won easily. He jig¬ gered the Jayger candidate by some¬ thing like Sfl to .^iO. Ever since Brower trimmed Jayger personally in Oceanside. some yeara ago. the latter haa been looking for trouble. On the last primary day he found It. The Brower forces now number four of the five committeemen in the Rockville Centre postal district.
The political game In Nassau was too strenuous for even so mighty a Democrat as Col. William E. Ball. No more will he flgure in the councils of his party, never again will be heard his mellifluous voice In behalf of the uplift. He has pulled up stakes in Rockville Centre and returned to his town house in Brooklyn. John M. McCooey is said to have heaved a sigh as heavy as one bf his Saratoga trunlts when he heard the news.
The Colonel's best boast In Nassau ^*as that he "made McCooey." It is strongly suspected that John is not over-proud of his maker. Deal ten¬ derly with him, John, when he insists fas he will). In managing the King's County machine. If you And any dlf- flculty in restraining him, you might send for Ed. Wallace, the lusty village president of R. V. C.
Somehow thd rumor will rtot down that our "Steve" designs to do'n the supervi.sorial toga after he sheds the shrievalty suit.
Commissioner of Jurors Brown's term of office will expire when the next fellow gets the appointment. Freeport's former postmaster. Bob Anderson, is said to be confident that be can whirl the ballot wheel and bring out (just as many good Jurora as Jim Brown. The County Clerk, Countv Judge wnd Diatrlct Attornev elected next fall mav Mve him a chance to make good, he thinks.
In the distribution of old official autos. the car of Phil Christ goes to our District Attorney. This may re¬ sult in a mixup If Lou gets to cam- nalgning as a candidate next fall, for if automobiles are anythioK lilce horses. Lou's machine, knowing every Democratic house in North ttemp-
3tead is bound to make frequent stops, i CUj*^ dkaMaa> D ^1 ^ Some one of theae might prove most j OOOC uOUllIlg ¦ AllOr {
embarassing to a Republican candi- _._„_,„. „„„ _
date. HATS CLEANED AND RBNOVATBU i
EMPLOTMEHT BUEEAV
GOOD HELP FURNISHED
A man wbo uses a one-time ad. is like a man who goes fishing with one minnow.—Col. Hugh Hastings, in the Cohoes Republican.
{This paragraph wouid make a good "flller" for the long columns of the Inquirer. It would gratify the pub¬ lisher. Colonel, and publishers should always be amused or entertained by tbe editor without detracting from his dignity.
CIOARS, CIGARETTES
J. A. CHASEALIS 44 So. Main SL
"Orangemen'' are members^-of the Irish society called the Loyal Orange Institution. The history of the or¬ ganization and the part It has played in Irish aflairs is, briefly, as follows: After the battle of the Boyne in 1690 the Roman Catholics of Ireland, who had Jacobin leanings and were on j that account looked upon with dis¬ favor and. indeed, oppressed by the English, formed several '.semi-rev¬ olutionary" societies. In opposition to them the Protestants founded the '..oya: Orange Insiifition, naming it .'fter llie King, William III. of the House of Orange, who had driven out the Catholic James II. The society ¦*as first established in Ulster in 1 795. Its object was tb oppose Roman Cath¬ olicism, to maintain tbe union of Ire¬ land and England, and to keep up the Protestant succession fo the English throne. It extended Its membership very rapidly, even organizing some! lodges In England and in Canada, and i on several occasions Parliament was ! forced to act to check its turbulence. It was suspended In Ireland from 1813 to 1828. Its political Influence as an organization in Ireland has long since died out. but it still exists as a so¬ ciety, with numerous lodges In the United States. -New York World.
What on earth ever became of al! | those farefully carved wooden Indians that guarded the entrance to the to¬ bacco emporiums of a former day? Perish the thought that the Wilson administration consorted with fhem In New York in Its earlier and callow days to the e.xcluslon of tiie real Tam¬ many Indian. The latter, by the way. is really an agreeable traveling com¬ panion especially in a Presidential compaign. But what of the wooden ones? Where in your travels did vou see one last?
The flre departmenl menagerie is growing. Another 'possum and an¬ other muskrat have been added to the collection. The flremen lost one of their pets last week, when John Call's water puppy died. The fire depart¬ ment zoo is composed of two 'possuins, fwo muskrats, a ground squirrel, an unnamed warter "varmint" and tbe Scotch Collie, "Toto." — Emporia Weekly Gazette.
Blakelock once a Brooklynitiv Brooklyn Eagle.
Seven cities claimed the Homer 'lead, where living Homer begged his bread.
THE UADIATOR.
EAGLE
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